Last week I asked about the image you saw when you looked into the mirror. Again, I ask the same question. What image do you see when you look into the mirror. I am not asking whether you are pleased with what you see there because what we think we see may look better than reality. Let me consider it another way. When we look into the mirror do we see a person that is created in the image of God?

     I believe that we can look good to ourselves because we feel good about ourselves even though we are walking outside the will of God. I believe that we are easily capable of deceiving ourselves when we rely on the capricious/changing nature of our feelings to know whether or not we walk in the company of God. This is not to denigrate feelings – I believe that feelings are essential to our overall well-being. I believe that our feelings should be engaged in our time of worship – that often they are not because we are not sure that it is appropriate to "feel good." Feelings are an integral part of relationships. Feeling is essential to the health of human beings. God created us with the ability to feel emotional response to things, both positively and negatively. Our Father in heaven desires us to experience His love with joy and love. He also desires that we feel anger, remorse, repentance and/or sadness when sin is engaged in our lives or in the lives of others.

     However, I believe that when we seek to let our feelings exclusively guide us in our decision making process we are setting ourselves to failure. This is especially true when it comes to what we see when we look in the mirror. How we "feel" should not determine whether we are engaged in activity that is dishonoring to God. Last week we spoke of anger as not being sinful in and of itself. Anger that is properly directed and expressed can be healthy and restorative. Anger that is allowed to rage without discrimination is unhealthy and destructive. Our sexuality is a gift from God and within the boundaries that God has given this for our expression in relationship it is good, but when used outside of the context of the boundaries that God has set can ultimately be destructive – even though it may "feel" right at the time.

     Having stated this, I would like us to get back to the text especially as it points to the issues raised in Ephesians 4. Shortly after our tenth wedding anniversary, Theri and I went on a Marriage Encounter weekend. One of the first things that we learned was found in the principle statement that led into the time – "Love is a decision." Too often we see love as something that we feel. It is different things to different people, but the reality of that felt love is that it makes us feel good. There was one thing that all the couples were empowered to see – we may not always feel love towards our spouse but we could choose to live in love with our spouse.

     That love that we are speaking of is a love that is not limited to the love of a husband and a wife. In fact, the love that we are looking at is one that is to be expressed by all that bear the image of God. All humanity bears the image of God at one level, but the one that looks into the mirror should see the reshaping of that image to a greater degree each day. I am not suggesting that God’s image will change to fit what we imagine. I am stating that we will choose each day to be conformed more to the image that He has revealed to us in His Son Jesus. To see what that image looks like we look to 1 Corinthians 13.

     The first thing that we find out is that love is not necessarily found in how spiritual we gifted we are or how we look or sound. Being knowledgeable (in an academic way) about God’s word does not make us loving people. No matter how much I involve myself in work for charitable organizations or even just helping people in general does not mean that I have sacrificed myself because of love. Jonathan Swift, author of Gulliver’s Travels wrote, "We have enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another." However, it is likely that the person who loves as God wants will display an increasing knowledge of His word; will exercise an increasing degree of Godly spirituality; and will increasingly be willing to give to those in need – these things, in part, show true religion as stated in James 1:27.

     Without a great deal of explanation, because the words speak for themselves let us look at the image of love. This image that is seen perfectly describes God: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. It is the image of this perfect love that we are called to witness when we look at the image of the mirror. It is this love that is to mark the character of the child of God.

• Love is patient – Patience gives us the ability to wait so that others may be able to walk with us in faith. It also helps us to look through the eyes of faith at the big picture rather than being trapped in the moment.
• Love is kind – Kindness is found in the way that we treat others with compassion and grace.
• Love does not envy – Envy/jealousy over what another has is ever an instrument of divisiveness and destruction of God’s people.
• Love does not boast – Boasting is an indication of a person that thinks more highly of himself/herself than is healthy. More, that person is not afraid to let others know.
• Love is not proud – Pride is the reason for the boasting just mentioned. A proper sense of pride recognizes the truth about one’s gifts. Arrogance (which is what Paul is referring to here) is that display that sets one person over another.
• Love is not rude – Rudeness is that quality of behavior that further accentuates a boastful and arrogant heart.
• Love is not self-seeking – Self-seeking is what the arrogant person focuses on. The world revolves around the one that has eyes only for himself/herself – at least so they think.
• Love is not easily angered – Anger is typically a person’s reaction to adversity. Sometimes there is a righteous anger, but more often our anger is purely "knee jerk" to an unwanted stimulus.
• Love keeps no record of wrongs – Record keeping should be left for the accountants. "Vengeance is mine. I will repay, says the Lord." When we are wronged we want what we perceive is justice. Not being a record keeper means that we wipe the slate clean when we forgive another.
• Love does not delight in evil – Evil occurs when we walk in the counsel of our own will and not the will of God. We like to think evil is only present in the overt oppression of others. We saw it with Hitler’s regime. We saw it with the treatment of the slaves in our land and in the continuing oppression of minorities. The truth is evil occurs whenever good people sit quietly by while these evils take place.
• Love rejoices with the truth – Truth, especially when lovingly administered, will always set us free.
• Love always protects – Protection is the evidence that truth is being properly administered. God protects us from the full effects of evil. If we think that the world can be a frightening place to live just think what it would be if God removed His Holy Spirit.
• Love always trusts – Trusting means that we are vulnerable because we choose to be open to another as we give ourselves in love. When we trust we say to another, "I will choose to love you knowing that you may do something that will cause me pain. And when you hurt me I will forgive you and begin to trust you again.
• Love always hopes – Hope is the active display of faith. "Faith is the assurance of things hoped for the assurance of things not seen." Hope builds character.
• Love always perseveres – Perseverance is the mark of persistence through the face of adversity. Perseverance fulfills the life of the one that hopes. The one that perseveres is the one that recognizes that "Hope is not a way out, it is a way through."
• Love never fails – Failure is not a part of the character of love. If one loves in the manner stated by Paul they look in the mirror and realize that they are truly the image-bearer of God in Christ Jesus.

     I spent a little time with this because it feeds us back to the quality/character of the Christian life. As God is love, we can fit the name of our Lord for the word love throughout the mentioned text. As we are called to bear the image of God, we are to work toward seeing our names being fit into each of those same slots. If we are not proficient at any of those things mentioned, then it is incumbent upon us to develop that characteristic in our lives. The reason that we are to see these characteristics developed is that God desires His church to be a place of healing not hurt, of wholesomeness not divisiveness, of life not death.

     To bring us back to the passage in Ephesians 4:29-32, we find that love is essential if we are not to grieve the Holy Spirit. I believe that God feels anguish over the loss of people that seek to defy His love. I think that our Father in heaven is grieved even more when we make a mockery of His love by living outside the context of His revealed will. Hebrews 6:4ff and 10:29ff deal with the reality of the pain that God feels when we dismiss the love He desires to give us. The love that He gives is so great that He chose to give His Son as the means by which He could forgive us and reconcile Himself to us.

     I have often been asked if forgiveness can be one-way. The answer to that is yes. However, for that forgiveness to have any lasting effect on a relationship it is essential that the person that is forgiven receive it. When forgiveness is received it is possible for reconciliation to take place. The difficult part now is how to rebuild a relationship that was broken. I believe that the essential ingredient is found in 1 Corinthians 13 and Ephesians 4. Our love is to be seasoned with the desire for the restoration of the broken relationship.

     "Love keeps no record of wrongs," it is forgiving. As God forgave us in Christ Jesus, we are to forgive one another – whether or not that forgiveness is recognized or received. We are not to "let unwholesome talk come out of your mouths." Any part of speech that is not intended to restore broken relationships should not be part of our conversation. This is not easy because there is not a person that wants to be hurt and exercising forgiveness makes it possible for us to be hurt again.

     This is the love that our Father in heaven exercises, though, and it is the love that we are called to display. When we recognize that we are created in the image of God we seek to live in conformity to His revealed will for us. That means that unconditional, self-sacrificial love is to be a part of our nature. The saying, "The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree," should describe the people we are in relationship to our heavenly Father.

     Together, let us seek to honor our Lord and Savior in the manner we choose to live. Let us display that love that shows that we are indeed created in God’s image. Let us show that love that sets people free to live to all the fullness that God intended in Christ Jesus. What do we see when we look in the mirror? I hope and pray that it is a living child of God!

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