What is the first response of a child whose will is thwarted? My experience is that the child becomes petulant. If the child continues to remain opposed he/she will begin to cry at the least and most likely throw a tantrum. The one thing that most of us realize is that this drives parents, and others that witness the tantrum, absolutely nuts. Those that are not the parents to the child wonder why the parents fail to train their child properly. The parents feel embarrassment and shame (especially if this behavior is in public), they wonder why the behavior is so poor because they did not raise the child that way, and they feel resentment to those that think they know how to handle the situation better.

     I find all of this interesting because adults are only older children. Our behavior has been refined (in some cases) to be more socially acceptable, but the reality is that we are just throwing better-disguised tantrums. The next time our spouse expresses a need (or opinion) contrary to ours I want to encourage you to look in the mirror. If our children are disobedient take the time to determine whether the response is appropriate to the misdemeanor. In either case, are we acting in a manner that glorifies God?

     More than that, we need to take the time to look outside our homes into our work environment, church, or other areas where we exercise influence. How do we respond to the boss, our fellow parishioners or pastor, or to those in the community when there is an offense (real or imagined)? Again, I would suggest that we take a look in the mirror.

     Whatever our life situation, what image do we see when we look in the mirror? The Apostles James and Paul deal with this kind of issue. We read the words from the letter of James with the hope that it will amplify the words of Paul to the Ephesian church. James wrote (vv. 23-24): "Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like." Most of us are quick to be the mirror for others with their shortcomings, but few are willing to stand up to the same scrutiny. Taking it even further, we especially dread the scrutiny of God’s word. The reason for that is because there is no wiggle-room before God whereas before other people we can always say, "I’m not as bad as those others."

     People in the church want to be perceived as "good Christians." But, being a Christian is not about being a good person, being ethically and morally righteous. Being a Christian is about a mindset and having a heart set on the Treasure that we have in heaven (eternal life with God) and within our own beings (the Holy Spirit). Being a Christian is about wanting a relationship with the God who created all things, and who in love sought to give knowledge and fulfillment of life to all who would call upon the name of Jesus. Living righteously is to be the natural (or should we say supernatural) outworking of that relationship. Being a "good Christian" happens when we make the choice to be renewed in the spirit of our minds and by making the decision to submit to the perfect will of God. Having stated that though, I will also say that there are no "good" Christians because only God is good. However, those Christians that seek to daily submit to God’s leading are "good" to those lost in the darkness of this world. This shows us to be the light of the world.

How do we live as light in the world?

1. Do not lie…speak truthfully. What is the benefit of a lie as opposed to the truth?
2. Do not let anger overwhelm…be self-controlled. Other than destruction, what does anger accomplish? It puts us in league with the agenda of the devil.
3. Do not steal…work usefully. What does stealing do to our overall benefit?
4. Do not speak unwholesomely…be helpful to others in their need. What benefit is there in talk that rips apart? Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.
5. Do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God who has sealed you for the day of redemption.
6. Get rid of:

     Let us begin to look at what image we want to see when we look in the mirror. We will finish next week.

     First, do not lie…speak truthfully. This is something that we all want to believe that we can affirm, but the reality is that we either do not always speak truthfully or we do not speak truthfully in love. Paul is clear regarding the life that the Christian is to lead – "You must no longer live as the non-believers do, in the futility of their thinking."

     The reason many lie is that it maintains the illusion that they are in control of that part of their lives. The one that lies believes that lying protects them from the consequences that will come from the truth being known. There is a general lack of trust that inhibits the willingness to be vulnerable. What is the trust that is necessary? It is a belief that the God of the universe allows nothing to happen outside the context of His perfect will for our lives (individually and corporately).

     Sometimes we speak the truth but we use it as a weapon. This is much like telling a lie. When truth is used as a weapon we find that it is used because we do not trust that truth will set us free. We believe that if we allow ourselves to be vulnerable with truthful disclosure (spoken with loving intent) we will be taken advantage of. Some will take advantage of the person that speaks the truth in love, but that does not have to be to our detriment. There is little doubt that the truth may hurt the hearer and/or the speaker, but the truth spoken in love is part of God’s power to heal.

     Those that calls themselves by the name of Christ must be willing to trust that God will always work through the truth and will always work despite the lie. He is able to work in this way because He will accomplish His plan for the all the world in His time. God is in control; therefore we have nothing to fear.

     Second, do not let anger overwhelm…be self-controlled. If you have never heard this before, hear it for the first time. Getting angry is not a sin. There are circumstances in life that demand that we respond with anger – just look at Jesus in the Temple (the most extreme) or in a couple of His dealings with the disciples (more subdued). Scripture teaches us that Jesus never sinned, which is why He was the perfect offering for sin. Anger is not sin until we allow it to overwhelm our ability to speak the truth in love. It is not sin until we allow it to become rage. Rage is not always visible to the naked eye. Rage is often controlled, or it might be better said that it is "stuffed" inside until we tip the precarious balance. If anger were always visible it would be able to be dealt with in a healthier fashion. Instead, we find that it is manifest in a variety of ways that destroy people (including/especially ourselves).

     In large part, who we are and what we choose is determined by how we handle the issues of life. I’ve often likened this to the way we deal with our luggage when we travel. How do we deal with our baggage when we return home? Do we get everything into our home and begin to unpack, sorting the dirty from the clean? Do we set it aside for the next day or two with the best intention to accomplish the task of getting our house in order? Do we set it aside, intending to get to it, only to find that the task (or guilt) overwhelms us because we did not deal with it when it was more manageable?

     We must look in the mirror. Those that deal with the luggage at once keeps the issues of life in perspective by handling issues as they arise. Their ability to separate the clean from the dirty (the good from the bad) empowers them to feel good about their homes (or lives). Those that set the luggage down for a little bit and get to it in relatively short order are able to handle things fairly well, but will occasionally find themselves overwhelmed because there might be more than they thought. The people that delay will find themselves in a quandary. They will find that the soiled garments will effect the clean and then everything must be washed. To be faced with such a project can be daunting and usually it is guilt inducing (because it is known that it would have been easier to do before and now it is the person’s fault for putting it off).

     The Spirit of God that dwells in the heart of the believer is able to help that person deal more appropriately with the circumstances that we face in life. More than that, the Holy Spirit is able (and willing) to bring healing to the one whose house is not in order. What are the evidences of a life out of control? Read Paul’s list in Ephesians 4:29-31.

     Third, "do not steal…work usefully." For most of us this seems to require little thought. Unfortunately, this is not as easy in some areas of the world as in others. How would we respond if we had no ability to put food on the table for our families? How would we live if we were forced to live on the streets with no real shelter?

     Unemployment is extremely low at this time in our nation, but it is not the case for many in the world today. Yet, the reality is that we find that many do steal from others. There is no real reason in our country to steal, but it happens. Crime is found in every walk of life. Crime is not limited to the so-called color of one’s skin. It is not bound by race or social status. However, we do know this – it is not to be a part of the Christian’s life. We need to pay attention to detail and determine before God how we are to live our lives. Insofar as it does no harm to another we are to live in accord with the laws of the state. Further, we need to go beyond the law of the land and submit all our ways even higher – to the Law of God.

     Fourth, "do not speak unwholesomely…be helpful to others in their need." What benefit is there in talk that rips apart? "Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry" (James 1:19). Unwholesome talk is not always found in profanity, coarse jokes, or the like. In fact, what Paul is speaking of here is that talk that breaks down relationships and is further spelled out in verse 31.

     Fifth, "do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God who has sealed you for the day of redemption." We grieve the Holy Spirit when we do not recognize the truth of the image we see in the mirror. It is here that I will ask that we pause until next week. For this is an area that is of great interest to the child of God. If it is properly understood it will change our lives in a way that nothing else could.

     In closing, if those behaviors are part of our daily experience then it is likely that we are living a life that is not under the control of the Spirit of God. We have a sign of broken lives and God’s desire is to heal the broken heart and to restore each person to a relationship built by the power of His love. God’s desire is that we be able to look in the mirror and see the image of His Son in our lives. What image do we see when we look in the mirror?

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